What'll It Be?
by Captain Arbitrary
Summary: On a hot summer day, the Turks stop for some ice cream in Costa del Sol.


Here I am, minding my own business, when inspiration bites my ass while I'm on line for an ice cream cone. This always happens around finals for some strange reason…

Disclaimer: I do not own these characters or Final Fantasy 7.

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><p>"…Vanilla. But are you guys sure we should be doing this? Won't the boss get mad if he catches us slacking off?" Elena spoke up, standing off to the side of the line for ice cream as she glanced expectantly between her two fellow Turks.<p>

"There she goes again, just like in Wutai." Her redheaded companion murmured with a heavy sigh, calmly addressing his balding partner who nodded in silent agreement. Reno went back to paying for their ice cream cones as if she had never said anything in the first place, prompting her to ask again.

"Didn't you hear me, Reno? I think we should—.."

"Listen doll face, will you just shut up already? I told you, we're on standby while we wait for orders from Rufus. Tseng can't say a _damn_ thing… at least not if we get him something."

"Pistachio." Rude interjected.

"You think so?"

"…Reno, listen. Why wait for the President's orders when we already know what's expected from us? We have the Keystone, so shouldn't we be heading for the Temple of the Ancients? Cloud and his friends—"

Reno slammed the money down on the counter and spun around sharply, staring her down. The doorbell faintly rang in the background.

"Are you questioning my authority, _rookie_?"

Clearly startled by this, Elena took a wary step back as he calmly took a step forward.

"I—I didn't mean that at all, I just think—"

"Tch. And after I went to the trouble of buying yours for you." He clucked his tongue, practically shoving the melting cone into her hands.

"HEY! You almost got it on my uniform!" Elena shrieked, steadying her hand from dropping it.

"What do you all think you're doing?" Their superior asked, appearing behind Elena as if from out of nowhere. Her face flushed after practically jumping out of her skin at the sound of his stern voice.

"Oh crap! Boss! We—uhh… It's just that… you see, Reno—"

"Good timing." Reno spoke up, flipping his bangs back with his free hand. "What'll it be, boss? Chocolate? You seem like a chocolate man to me."

"_Excuse_ me?"

"…What he means, Boss, is what flavor do you want?" Rude answered for his partner, readjusting his sunglasses with one hand.

"I know what he meant!" Tseng snapped at him, glaring at each of his subordinates. "What I want to know is why you idiots think its okay to stop for ice cream at a time like this?"

"Sir, I apologize for this!" Elena straightened up, saluting her boss with one hand while holding her untouched ice cream cone in the other.

"I don't blame you, Elena." Tseng shook his head, collecting himself again. "I think I already know the mastermind behind all of this."

"Oh? Whoever could that be?" Reno asked smugly. "We've already ruled out Ms. Goody Two-shoes over here, haven't we?"

Elena opened her mouth to speak but Rude intervened, trying to lessen the tension building. "Does it even matter, at this point? We're already finished here. We can just take our cones with us, can't we?"

"Very well, then. If you two really are done screwing around, and if you care at all about your jobs, I suggest you get off your asses and get a move on. I'll be going on ahead with the Keystone to wait for Sephiroth and Cloud."

A heavy silence filled the ice cream parlor as Tseng made subtle eye contact with each of them before turning to leave. His softly spoken words appeared to have stung Elena's ears as she visibly flinched when he passed by, despite the fact that he had excused her moments before.

Reno boldly took a step forward, jangling around some change in his pocket.

"Hold up. You sure you don't want anything, Boss?"

Tseng paused in the doorway.

"…I don't normally indulge in such things while I'm on duty." He answered without looking back.

"A flavor says a lot about a man…" Reno began, improvising. It seemed to grab his superior's attention, if only for a moment.

Tseng cocked his right brow, glancing over his shoulder. "It's _ice cream_."

"Yeah, and I'm buying." His subordinate grinned. "So why the hell not?"

"…"

"…Take Rude, for example. Rocky Road. He's a passionate man. The scars of his past are hidden beneath his calm, level-headed exterior…" Reno slapped his stoic partner on the arm out of amusement, whose emotions were, as always, masked behind his shades. "I, myself, am more partial to Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough, because I enjoy variety, along with the finer things in life."

"Really? What does mine say?" Elena chimed in with piqued curiosity.

"Boring."

"Prude."

"_EXCUSE ME_?"

"Strawberry… with whipped cream and rainbow sprinkles." Tseng mused aloud. This seemed to catch them off guard. "Yes... That's what I want. Get it for me, will you?"

Their silence assured Tseng that he had successfully drawn their attention over to him, causing his lips to quirk up ever so slightly while his back was turned. The sound of the door bell ringing signaled his departure as they stared after him, somewhat dumbfounded and amazed.

Reno pursed his lips and turned back towards the register, begrudgingly digging around for the change in his pocket.

"…He always gets the last word."

"Gotta hand it to the man." Rude smirked, tipping his shades back up the length of his nose. "Full of surprises."

"So it seems. I didn't know he swung that way." His hotheaded partner chuckled, slightly amused at his weakened sense of humor yet more so annoyed than he was before.

"Well, maybe he's just not trying to compensate for anything." Elena spoke up, soon followed by the chime of the doorbell. Reno's pocket change somehow managed to spill all over the counter.

"…No, she did."

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><p>Guess I'm a boring prude, as well. :) Finals are making me a bit crazy, though. What flavors do you like?<p> 


End file.
